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baldwinta 73M
41 posts
7/9/2006 4:34 am

Last Read:
8/31/2006 4:42 am

Having Sex or Making Love?

One of my new friends called me the other day. He asked if I would like to get together. After determining he wanted dessert, not lunch, we made arrangements to meet.
This particular friend is someone I met at a video parlor. That's right guys - we were jerking and sucking in a semi-public place! And when he left, he hands me his # and asks me to call! This recent matinee was our 2nd get-together since the parlor.
After almost 2hrs together, we each left feeling that we wanted more. I would like to be able to see him in a dating situation. I could see him wondering why he allowed a woman to move in with him. (He is my age, divorced). But what we shared in that room was more than just sex. We had made love. The video parlor is having sex. But not all motels involve making love.
I have another friend w/benefits, and for him it is all about sex. Not making love. Don't get me wrong- it's great sex, but it is not making love.

And here comes the issue that many will say I have no right to complain about.
Of course I am married. And this site (and others) has more married men looking for men than I really care to count. And yes - by dropping trou we are cheating on our wives. In a first howdy/how do with one man, I told him I considered myself an adulterer - he didn't like that because it made him one also, and he wasnt ready for that. Oh well! No - I am not supposed to have a LTR. I have one. But I want another - with a man. How I do that without seriously hurting my wife and our relationship is somthing I may never figure out, but I have no problem with a man showing up at my funeral claiming to be my lover (reminds me of Albee's play, "All Over"). The wife would have suspected; so too the .
Oh, dear friends and readers, I am not asking your permission to have a LTR. Please- don't respond with your moralizing; I know the routine.

Okay - feels better now - I actually put in writing what I'm feeling, and lonely is not part of it. Neither is slutty or whorey.
This whole reawakening is at a time of life when there are so many changes going on around me (maybe I'm just menopausal?). is finished with school - staring his adult life and career. But where and doing what? Wife is hornier than ever and giving herself more time to share with me. And me - I crave that which I used to have. MEN!
Our parents are all deceased so I am not worried about them being upset. Our families? Truly a dysfunctional group who barely talk to us anyway!
Really feeling better now - time to go to work - thanks for listening!

Wishing you wet dreams and hard-on days!

dano00 61M

7/9/2006 9:14 am

Well, no judgements from me. I live with the same conflicts.

No easy answers, just more questions. You have do to what is right for you, and no one but yourself can understand that.

All my best

roughotightbotom 77M/M

7/9/2006 1:46 pm

I feel one must pursue their desires & find fulfillment. As long as you are an adult & willing to accept the consequences if found out & you're not doing anything with children nor animals it is noones business but your own.
If you don't satisfy those cravings, eventually the tension, stress & bitterness will destroy your marriage.
Hugs, Clint

Do not ask the Lord to guide your footsteps if you're not willing to move your feet!