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4 Monjas 13/5/2007
Y eso que yo me considero católico !!!
4 Monjas viajaban en un jeep y el conductor se durmió y embarrancó.
Resultado: Las 4 monjs murieron y se fueron directo al cielo.
Allí las esperó San Pedro y antes de dejarles entrar alcielo
les hizo la pregunta de "rigor": S.P.: Dime, Sor Eustacia, alguna vez has tocado un pene
? Sor Eustacia: Si, lo he hecho, una sola vez y solo con dos
dedos ...
4 Comentarios, 85 Vistas,
6 Votos
,5.07 Puntuación
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CHISTES DE MEDICOS 18/7/2006
SABES CUAL ES LAVENA QUE LLEGA DE LA BOCA AL ANO............PUES
LAVENA QUACKER......
SABES CUANTAS VENAS TIENE EN PENE.............................SETECIENTAS.
SABES CUANTAS VENAS TIENE EL CULO.......
..................CIENTO Y PICO.............
SABES CUAL ES LA VENA CENTRAL DE LA VAGINA QUE ES INCONSTANTE............................ ...
1 Comentarios, 103 Vistas,
7 Votos
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UN CHISTE!! 21/6/2006
LA DIFERENCIA ENTRE SER RICO O SER POBRE.
*Rico con pistola.......................precavido
* Pobre con pistola....................delincuente
* Rico con manicura......................play boy
* Pobre con manicura ..................Maricón
* Rico con alas.............................ángel
* Pobre con alas.......................murciélago
...
0 Comentarios, 149 Vistas,
16 Votos
,4.60 Puntuación
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CERVEZA O MUJERES? 27/5/2006
Estas invitado a plantear nuevas alternativas.
Una CERVEZA esta siempre mojada. La MUJER no... ¡punto
para la CERVEZA!
La CERVEZA es horrible si está caliente... ¡punto para
la MUJER!
Una CERVEZA helada te satisface... ¡punto para la CERVEZA!
Si regresas a casa oliendo a CERVEZA, tu mujer puede enojarse.
Si llegas a casa oliendo a MUJERES, tu ...
1 Comentarios, 383 Vistas,
31 Votos
,4.87 Puntuación
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UN EJERCICIO ENCANTADOR 27/5/2006
ES UN EJERCICIO ENCANTADOR –
Para completar y gozar!!!!!!!!!!!
Concéntrate un ratito.
A, E, I, O, U
Repetir fuerte: A-E-I-O-U
AHORA UNA FRASE
FRASE a repetir:
"Mi moto alpina derrapante"
Ahora con puras vocales abierta A,
"Ma ...
0 Comentarios, 101 Vistas,
3 Votos
,2.94 Puntuación
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EL DOCTOR 27/5/2006
Un muchacho se gradúa de médico y el padre le regala un auto
0 km. Para
estrenarlo se va solo a recorrer el norte del país. Llega
a un pueblito y va
a la estación de servicio a cargar combustible.
La estación estaba vacía y nadie le daba bola. Toca bocina,
aparece un
muchachito y le dice:
Señor no lo va a atender nadie, se murió la del patrón
y están todos en
...
2 Comentarios, 103 Vistas,
5 Votos
,3.80 Puntuación
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El árabe, el judío y el gallego. 27/5/2006
El Árabe jamás había pagado una deuda y el Judío jamás había
perdido un solo centavo en alguna transacción...
Pasó el tiempo y el árabe había estado escondiéndose del
judío y éste nunca había logrado agarrarlo para que le pagara.
Hasta que un día, ellos se cruzaron en el bar de un gallego.
Ahí comenzaron a discutir. El árabe acorralado no encontró
otra salida: ...
0 Comentarios, 58 Vistas,
3 Votos
,2.94 Puntuación
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FELIZ AO NUEVO 25/5/2006
Están un matrimonio de viejos, y uno dice:
- ¡Fegiz ane uego!
- Pero Raimundo, cómo que feliz año nuevo, si no es Navidad.
- ¡Fegiz ane uego!
- Pero qué dices, carcamal, si estamos en agosto.
- ¡Fegiz ane uego!
- A ver, espera que te pongo la dentadura, que no te entiendo...
- ¡¡Felisa, me muero!!
0 Comentarios, 47 Vistas,
2 Votos
,5.20 Puntuación
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pesca o sexo?? 25/5/2006
Cuatro hombres casados van a pescar. Después de una hora,
se escucha
la siguiente conversación :
HOMBRE 1: "No tienes ni idea de lo que tuve que hacer
para venir a
pescar este fin de semana. Tuve que prometer a mi señora
que pintaría
toda
la casa el próximo fin de semana!
HOMBRE 2: "Eso no es nada. Yo tuve que prometer que
le construiría
una terraza nueva para la ...
0 Comentarios, 91 Vistas,
5 Votos
,4.45 Puntuación
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donde esta Bob?? 25/5/2006
George Bush va a un colegio de primaria para hablar sobre
la guerra.
Después de hablar, les dice a los que le pregunten
lo que quieran.
Un levanta la mano, y George le pregunta como se llama.
-Bob.
-¿Y cuál es tu pregunta, Bob?
-Tengo 3 preguntas:
Primera: ¿Por qué EE. UU. invadió Irak sin el apoyo de la
ONU?
Segunda: ¿Por qué es usted el presidente si Al Gore ...
6 Comentarios, 895 Vistas,
60 Votos
,7.57 Puntuación
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UN PROBLEMA SIN SOLUCION APARENTE?? 23/5/2006
Un profesor de matemáticas que quería pasarse de listo
con sus alumnos y les plantea un problema:
''- Un avión despega desde Londres a 600 Km./h
en dirección Este.
El viento tenía dirección Norte 40 nudos de intensidad.
Tiene una capacidad para 200 pasajeros y lleva 67, uno de
los cuales es un tío mío que vive en Madrid y tiene 53 años.
¿Qué edad tengo yo?"
Luego de unos ...
0 Comentarios, 49 Vistas,
4 Votos
,2.86 Puntuación
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QUIEN ES EL CORNUDO????? 22/5/2006
Un individuo sospechaba que su mujer tenia otro hombre,
un dia decide regresar a casa antes de lo previsto y la sorprende
efectivamente durmiendo con otro hombre..
Desenfundó el revólver con cuidado para no despertarlos..
apuntó... y cuando estaba listo para meter la primera bala....
Se puso a pensar....... Fue ahí que se dió cuenta cómo su
vida de casado había mejorado en los ...
0 Comentarios, 64 Vistas,
3 Votos
,5.39 Puntuación
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Tnganlo en cuenta para cuando sus nenas pregunten ....... 22/5/2006
La niñita llegó del colegio, tomó su merienda y se puso a
completar
sus tareas.
Rato mas tarde llegó el padre. Saludó a madre e , se cambió
y se
dispuso a leer. La se acercó a su padre y le dijo:
"Perdón papá, ¿te puedo hacer una pregunta?"
- "Por supuesto "
- "¿qué es pene?"
El hombre sonrió para sus adentros.¡Era el momento que
había estado
...
0 Comentarios, 56 Vistas,
4 Votos
,5.57 Puntuación
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CULTURA GENERAL 22/5/2006
> En promedio las ballenas azules producen más de 400
galones de
> esperma cuando eyaculan pero sólo el 10% es depositado
en la pareja.
> De modo que 360 galones son derramados en los océanos
> cada vez que realizan una descarga eyaculativa.
> ¿Y usted se pregunta porqué el mar es tan salado?
> Sugerencia: No trague agua de mar.
...
0 Comentarios, 60 Vistas,
2 Votos
,4.50 Puntuación
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Matrimonio 22/5/2006
Un hombre entra en la habitación con una cabra en los brazos...
Su mujer echada en la cama está leyendo un libro...
Dice el hombre:
- Mira cariño, esta es la vaca que me cojo cuando tenés dolor
de cabeza...
La mujer, "sobrándolo", le contesta:
- Si no fueras tan boludo, te darías cuenta de que eso es una ...
0 Comentarios, 51 Vistas,
4 Votos
,5.19 Puntuación
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LOS MONJES 22/5/2006
Un tipo estaba de viaje por la India y decide pedir alojamiento
en un templo de monjes.
Al visitante le asignaron una habitación que tenia tres
ventanas.
Por la primera, vio a todos los monjes desnudos con el pene
sobre una gran mesa.
Por la segunda, vio a una hermosa mujer desnuda acostada
en una cama.
Por la tercera, vio a un monje colgado de una soga, ...
0 Comentarios, 74 Vistas,
2 Votos
,5.20 Puntuación
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Lo Injusto de la edad 22/5/2006
Un tipo cuidaba mucho de su cuerpo.
Era completamente narcisista, estilista y tomaba mucho
sol.
Una mañana se paró desnudo frente al espejo para admirar
su cuerpo, y notó
que estaba todo bronceado, a excepción de su pene.
Entonces decidió hacer algo al respecto. Fue a la playa,
se desvistió
completamente y se cubrió todo de arena, menos aquello...
...
0 Comentarios, 70 Vistas,
5 Votos
,5.10 Puntuación
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Investigaciones Cientficas sobre el mal de Alzheimer 22/5/2006
Según investigaciones realizadas en varios países, en
el año 2004, en el
mundo se gastó cinco veces más dinero en implantes de senos
y en Viagra,
que en investigación para curar el Mal de Alzheimer. Por
lo tanto, es
inevitable que en 10 años más, habrá en este planeta, un
gran número de
personas con enormes tetas y tremendas erecciones, pero...incapaces
de
recordar para ...
0 Comentarios, 48 Vistas,
2 Votos
,5.20 Puntuación
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CREASE O NO 22/5/2006
COMPRUEBA EL SIGUIENTE ESTUDIO CIENTÍFICO
Sgeun etsduios raleziaods por una uivenrsdiad ignlsea,
no ipmotra el odren en el que las ltears etsen
ecsritas, la uicna csoa ipormtnate es que la pmrirea y la
utlima ltera esetn ecsritas en la psiocion cocrreta.
El retso peuden etsar ttaolmntee mal y aun
pordas lerelo sin pobrleams, pquore
no lemeos cada ltera en si msima snio ...
0 Comentarios, 50 Vistas,
1 Votos
,5.00 Puntuación
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CORNUDO CONCIENTE Y AVERGONZADO 22/5/2006
Un tipo recibe una llamada anónima avisándole que su mujer
lo engaña todos los días en cuanto el se va a trabajar.
Al día siguiente el tipo parte, pero se queda espiando desde
la esquina.
Al rato ve llegar a un galán buen mozo, atlético, aristocrático,
ropa italiana última moda, el cual con un ramo de flores
en la mano toca el timbre de su casa.
Desde lejos ve que su ...
0 Comentarios, 67 Vistas,
3 Votos
,5.39 Puntuación
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CALIDAD DE VIDA?? 22/5/2006
Hoy me levanté media hora antes, porque ya no voy más al centro
en auto, y de esa forma me ahorro 10 pesos por día en estadía,
que en el mes son 220 pesos y por año 2640 pesos.
Me bañé, tomé un café cortado y salí rápidamente, ya que
no compro más el diario, y me ahorro por mes casi 45 pesos
y por año $ 540.
Trabajé todo el día y volví a mi casa, cerca de la ...
0 Comentarios, 63 Vistas,
3 Votos
,3.43 Puntuación
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EL SABOR DE LA VENGANZA 17/5/2006
Nunca había entendido por qué las necesidades sexuales
de los hombres y las mujeres son tan diferentes entre si.
Nunca había entendido todo eso de Marte y Venus. Y nunca
había entendido por qué los hombres piensan con la "cabeza"
y las mujeres con el corazón. Una noche, la semana pasada,
mi mujer y yo nos íbamos a la cama. Bueno, empezamos a franelearnos
con el inevitable y picaron ...
0 Comentarios, 83 Vistas,
5 Votos
,5.43 Puntuación
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Se ensarto solo y se enojo. 21/12/2005
Habia un joven llenito mas bien sin ser gordo y bien sexy.
De baja estatura para mi. Nos pegamos una mirada y entramos
en una cabina. Le retiré su toalla y el a mi la mia. La verdad
es que me excitaba mucho ver todas sus redondeces bien llenitas.
Lo comence a acariciar y a darle besos en el cuello, mientras
mis manos estaban entretenidas mas abajoen su posterior.
Mi verga durisima. Para ...
0 Comentarios, 3149 Vistas,
169 Votos
,2.77 Puntuación
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Some Jokes to lighten your day. 15/5/2009
The big bad wolf said: "I'll huff, and I'll puff, and I'll
blow your house down!" The little pig replies: "Fuck off or I'll sneeze on you!"
What's the difference between ignorance and apathy?
I dont know and I dont care.
A woman brings eight-year-old Johnny home and tells his
mother that he was caught playing doctors and nurses with
Mary, her eight-year-old ...
3 Comentarios, 211 Vistas,
9 Votos
,5.78 Puntuación
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Nympho Nun! 26/12/2008
a new young nun arrived at a convent and was welcomed rather
warmly.
after a short tour by one of the older nuns, she was taken
to her new room and then to supper.
during bedtime, she couldnt sleep. she knows the only thing
that could make her sleep was a round of sex.
she got out of bed and took a walk. she passed by an office
and to her amazement found a 9 inch dildo ...
0 Comentarios, 339 Vistas,
10 Votos
,3.39 Puntuación
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a couple of one liners 29/5/2008
Did you hear about the plastic surgeon who hung himself?
Did you hear about the two gay judges who tried each other?
1 Comentarios, 221 Vistas,
7 Votos
,2.02 Puntuación
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CALL THE POLICE 5/4/2008
CALL THE POLICE Apr 1, 2008 1:19 am 222 Views It was late and I was not concentrating as I approached an
old friend who seems distressed. Concerned, I asked him
why he was frigidity and uptight, nervous and speaking
with broken syllables. His shirt was torn out of his pants, he was dazed--somewhat
stoned. I asked "Tom, did you drink tonight?"
"No, No, ..." He kept repeating and looking
in all ...
2 Comentarios, 393 Vistas,
11 Votos
,2.61 Puntuación
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One Night Wonder? 7/2/2008
The man of your dreams, for now, stands across the room from
you and can't keep his eyes off you. You do your best
to look calm, sexy and sober. He approaches you and you look
around to check he's not heading to some incredibly
chiselled, buff, sexy as all fuck god behind you. In the
meantime, he has stumbled across the room, fought his way
through a throng of unhappy lesbians and pregnant ...
2 Comentarios, 421 Vistas,
8 Votos
,3.25 Puntuación
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Absolutely Funny!!! 16/12/2007
A flat-chested young lady went to Dr. Smith about enlarging
her tiny breasts.
Dr. Smith advised her, "Every day after your shower
rub your chest and say, "'Scooby doobie doobies,
I want bigger boobies'."
She did this faithfully for several months and it worked!
She grew terrific D-cup boobs!
One morning she was running late, got on the bus and in a panic
realized she ...
2 Comentarios, 305 Vistas,
11 Votos
,4.85 Puntuación
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This is my last joke...unless I get a rise from someone 7/12/2007
A farmer ordered a high tech automatic milking machine.
Since it arrived while his wife was away shopping, he thought
he would try it out on himself. He opened it up and slipped
his "Manhood" into the equipment, turned on
the switch and everything else was automatic. Soon he realized that the machine was providing him a lot
more pleasure than his wife ever did. When the fun was over
he found that ...
3 Comentarios, 404 Vistas,
13 Votos
,5.66 Puntuación
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OK, Maybe You'll Like This One 7/12/2007
A lone cowboy rides into town right off the dusty trail.
He climbs down from his horse and ties the reins to a hitchin
post. He takes off his hat and slaps his jeans to knock off
the days dust. He then goes to the back of the horse, raises
his tail and plants a big kiss right on his asshole. A man
standing nearby witnessed this and asked him why in the
hell did he do that. The cowboy told him ...
1 Comentarios, 299 Vistas,
11 Votos
,5.04 Puntuación
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Adult Bookstore Salesman! 6/12/2007
It was the first day on the job for this young man at a local
adult bookstore. His boss had watched him work the register
and felt he was doing OK so he told him to mind the store while
he ran some errands. After the owner left, a very good looking woman entered
the store and went right past the books and videos to the
wall where all the toys were. She was picking up several
different dildos ...
3 Comentarios, 426 Vistas,
15 Votos
,6.19 Puntuación
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The Good Sons 2/12/2007
Three brothers got together after they graduated from
college and reflected on how they were doing in life and
how they got there. They all agreed that it was mostly because
of their mother. She worked very hard to put them thru college
and made many sacrifices. They decided that it was time
to reward her for all her efforts. During the next year,
they would all make some attempt to make their ...
1 Comentarios, 311 Vistas,
11 Votos
,5.97 Puntuación
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Road Trip 15/11/2007
While on a road trip, an elderly couple stopped at a roadside
restaurant for lunch.
After finishing their meal, they left the restaurant and
resumed their trip.
When leaving, the elderly woman unknowingly left her glasses
on the table and she didn't miss them until they had
been driving about twenty minutes.
By then, to add to the aggravation, they had to travel quite
a ...
1 Comentarios, 243 Vistas,
8 Votos
,3.71 Puntuación
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The Love Story of Ralph and Edna 15/11/2007
because someone doesn't love you the way you want them
to, doesn't mean they don't love you with all they
have. Ralph and Edna were both patients in a mental hospital.
One day while they were walking past the hospital swimming
pool. Ralph suddenly jumped into the deep end. He sank to
the bottom of the pool and stayed there.
Edna promptly jumped in to save him. She swam to the bottom
and ...
2 Comentarios, 163 Vistas,
10 Votos
,5.38 Puntuación
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Nurse Humor 14/11/2007
A nurse walks into a bank totally exhausted after a 20 hour
shift. Oreparring to write a check, she pulls out a rectal therometer
from her purse and tries to write with it. She looks at the flabbergasted teller and without skipping
a beat she says, "That's great.......that's really great......
some asshole has got my pen.
1 Comentarios, 244 Vistas,
9 Votos
,5.78 Puntuación
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How Sweet! 21/10/2007
This happened at Harvard University in October of last
year. In a biology class the professor was discussing the
high glucose levels found in semen which give the sperm
all the energy they need to complete their journey.
A female freshman raised her hand and asked, "If I
understand you correctly, your saying that there's
a lot of glucose, as in sugar, in semen?"
"That's ...
0 Comentarios, 277 Vistas,
11 Votos
,5.97 Puntuación
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What's The Difference??? 21/10/2007
What's the difference between love, true love and
showing off?
Spitting, swallowing and gargling
0 Comentarios, 144 Vistas,
6 Votos
,4.22 Puntuación
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Best Round of Golf Ever! 21/10/2007
A man was at the country club shooting a round of golf. He
was having a great round, on the first hole he scored a birdie,
on the second hole he managed an eagle and the third hole
was his first ever hole in one.
His cell phone rang and it was a doctor at a local hospital
informing him that his wife had been in a terrible accident
and was in ICU. He told the doctor to tell her where he ...
2 Comentarios, 214 Vistas,
5 Votos
,4.77 Puntuación
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The Italian Golfer! 21/10/2007
An 80 year old Italian man goes to the doctor for a checkup.The
doctor is amazed at what good physical condition he is in
and asks, "How do you stay in such great physical condition?"
"I'm Italian and I'm a golfer", says
the old guy, "and that's why I stay in such good
shape. I'm up before daylight and get out on the fairways
as soon as it's light. I go up and down the fairways,
come ...
0 Comentarios, 167 Vistas,
8 Votos
,6.03 Puntuación
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BLONDE JOKE 21/10/2007
A girl was visiting her blonde friend, who had aquired two
new puppies, and asked her what their names were. The blonde
responded by saying one was named Rolex and the other was
named Timex. Her friend said, "who ever heard of someone naming
a dogs like that?" "HELLOOOOOO!" the blonde replied, "they're
watch dogs!"
0 Comentarios, 146 Vistas,
3 Votos
,4.41 Puntuación
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Little Known Facts 21/10/2007
IF YOU YELLED FOR 8 MONTHS 7 DAYS AND 6 HOURS YOU WOULD PRODUCE
ENOUGH ENERGY TO HEAT ONE CUP OF COFFEE! (hardly seems worth it)
IF YOU FARTED 6 YARS AND NINE MONTHS, ENOUGH GAS IS PRODUCED
TO CREATE THE ENERGY OF THE ATOM BOMB! (now that's more like it)
THE HUMAN HEART PRODUCES ENEOUGH PRESSURE TO SQUIRT BLOOD
OVER 30 FEET! (OMG!)
A PIG'S ORGASM LASTS 30 ...
0 Comentarios, 84 Vistas,
3 Votos
,4.41 Puntuación
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ASSICONS 21/10/2007
We all know tghose cute little computer symbols called
"emoticons", where:  means a smile and  means a frown. Sometimes these are represented by or or  ) or (
Well how about some ASSICONS? HERE GOES;(_!_) A regular ass
(__!__) A fat ass
(!) A tight ass
(_*_) A sore ass
{_!_} A swishy ass ...
2 Comentarios, 121 Vistas,
6 Votos
,3.65 Puntuación
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An Irish Ballerina 21/10/2007
A large woman wearing a sleeveless sun dress walked into
a pub in Dublin. She raised her right arm, revealing a huge, harry armpit
as she pointed to all the people at the bar and asked, "what
man here will buy a lady a drink?" The bar went silent as all the patrons tried to ignore her.
But at the other end of the bar, an owl-eyed old drunk slammed
his hand on the bar and bellowed, "bartender, ...
0 Comentarios, 103 Vistas,
6 Votos
,5.07 Puntuación
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|
Nair Hair 7/10/2007
My neighbor found out that her little dog couldn't
hear very well so she took him to the vet. The vet found that
his ears were compacted with excessive hair and removed
the hair and cleaned out his ears. He told the lady that she
could keep this from reoccouring by simply going to the
drug store and buy some Nair hair remover and swab his ears
once a month. The lady went to the drug store and got ...
0 Comentarios, 156 Vistas,
4 Votos
,5.57 Puntuación
|
|
My wife left me! 7/10/2007
I don't understand, after the last child was born,
my wife told me we had to cut back on our expenses, I had to
quit drinking beer. I was not a big drinker, maybe a twelve pack on weekends,
but I soon quit anyway. One day, while helping her put away
the groceries, I came across a receipt that was $45 for makeup.
I said, "wait a minute, I've given up beer and
you haven't given up anything yet!" ...
0 Comentarios, 196 Vistas,
7 Votos
,5.84 Puntuación
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What do you call kinky sex with chocolate? 7/10/2007
PAGR DOWN FOR ANSWER
S&M&M
0 Comentarios, 106 Vistas,
4 Votos
,4.41 Puntuación
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Bad Sunburn 7/10/2007
A man falls asleep on the beach and wakes up with a horrible
sunburn. He goes to the hospital and is admitted with second
degree burns. With his skin already beginning to blister,
The Dr prescribes continuous intravenus feeding with
saline, electrolytes, a sedative and a viagra pill every
four hours. The nurse who is astounded asked, "what good will
the viagra do him?" The Dr. replied, "it'll ...
0 Comentarios, 116 Vistas,
3 Votos
,5.39 Puntuación
|
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Have you have a Prostate exam lately? 7/10/2007
Two guys were talking.
One described his recent, first-ever prostate exam, "The
doctor bends you over his examination table and then he
puts his left hand on your shoulder...no wait, it was his
right hand...[thinks for a minute]... Damn! He had both hands on my shoulders."
0 Comentarios, 158 Vistas,
6 Votos
,5.36 Puntuación
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Wanna Slip Into Something More Comfortable? 27/9/2007
Cecil and Scott are living together. It was extremely hot
one day and Cecil arrived home to find Scott with his ass
in the freezer.
"Scott! What are you doing with your ass in the freezer?"
Scott replied, "It was so hot outside, I thought you'd
like something cool to slip into!"
1 Comentarios, 159 Vistas,
6 Votos
,4.22 Puntuación
|
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Judging the SIZE! 27/9/2007
JUDGING THE SIZE
A woman sought the advice of a sex therapist, confiding
that she found it increasingly difficult to find a man who
could satisfy her, and that it was very wearisome getting
in and out of all these short term relationships.
"Isn't there some way to judge the size of a man's
equipment from the outside?" she asked earnestly.
"The only ...
0 Comentarios, 121 Vistas,
3 Votos
,4.90 Puntuación
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Blind Man 17/9/2007
A blind man enters a Ladies Bar by mistake. He finds his way
to a bar stool and orders a drink. After sitting there for a while,
he yells to the bartender, "Hey, you wanna hear a blonde joke?"
The bar immediately falls absolutely quiet. In a very deep,
husky voice, the woman next to him says, "Before you tell that joke,
sir, I think it is just fair - giving that you are blind - that you should ...
0 Comentarios, 144 Vistas,
5 Votos
,4.12 Puntuación
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Don't Lie To Your Mother 16/9/2007
A young man called Paul invited his mother for dinner, during
the course of the meal; his mother couldn't help but
notice how handsome Paul's flat mate, Simon, was.
She had long been suspicious of a relationship between
the two, and this only made her more curious. Over the course
of the evening, while watching the two interact, she started
to wonder if there was more between Paul and his flat ...
3 Comentarios, 190 Vistas,
10 Votos
,6.57 Puntuación
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A Stinky Pussy 5/9/2007
One December day we found an old straggly cat at our door.
She was a sorry sight. She was starving, dirty, smelled terrible,
skinny, and hair all matted down.
We felt sorry for her so we put her in a carrier and took her
to the vet. We didn't know what to call her so we named her "Pussycat."
The vet decided to keep her for a day or so. He said he would
let us know when we ...
1 Comentarios, 121 Vistas,
6 Votos
,5.64 Puntuación
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A Quicky! 4/9/2007
What do you get if you cross an insomniac, an agnostic, and
a dyslexic?
Someone who stays awake at night wondering if there really
is a dog.
2 Comentarios, 76 Vistas,
3 Votos
,4.41 Puntuación
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Used Rubbers! 26/8/2007
Do you know how to reuse a rubber?? A. You turn it inside out and shake the fuck out of it!
What do you call a hooker with a runny nose? A. Full!
0 Comentarios, 104 Vistas,
5 Votos
,4.12 Puntuación
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I don't care who you are, this is funny! 22/8/2007
Nymphomaniacs Convention
A man boarded an airplane and took his seat. As he settled
in, he glanced up to see the most beautiful woman he had ever
seen boarding the plane and was headed right toward him.
As luck would have it, she sat in the seat next to him. Eager to strike up a conversation he blurted out, "business
trip or pleasure?" She smiled at him and replied, "business, ...
0 Comentarios, 183 Vistas,
10 Votos
,6.37 Puntuación
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Two old Ladies 2/8/2007
There was two old ladies doing charity work at a nursing
home. They stepped out back to smoke a cigarette. After
they took a few a few puffs, it started to rain. One lady put
out her cigarette and started to walk in when she saw her
friend pull out a condom from her pocket and then cut the
end off with the sizzors from her other pocket. She then
slid the condom over her cigarette, exposing the ...
1 Comentarios, 232 Vistas,
7 Votos
,4.82 Puntuación
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Golf Again 29/7/2007
Two old men were playing a round of golf one day and when they
got to the 18th hole, they noticed a hearse and funeral procession
going by on the main road along side the 18th hole. Sam removed
his hat and placed it over his heart and bowed his head as
his friend looked on. When the funeral procession was past,
Sam put on his hat and started to line up his next shot. His
friend said, "Sam, that ...
0 Comentarios, 112 Vistas,
4 Votos
,5.57 Puntuación
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More Golf 29/7/2007
Three generations of men, the son, the father of the son
and the father of the father decided to play a round of golf.
They were at the first tee ready to tee off whan a lovely young
woman came up to them and asked if she could join them. It
seemed her partner, a doctor, had a last minute emergency
and had to leave her alone. They all looked at each other
and said sure, ladies first! The lady got ...
0 Comentarios, 131 Vistas,
2 Votos
,5.20 Puntuación
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Two Lovely Lesbians 28/7/2007
These two lovely lesbians were sitting side by side at the
bar. Neither one knew the other, but they both knew why they
were there. Neither one wanted to make the first move. Finally
one turns to the other and says, "let me be frank...."
and the other jumps back, "No, let me be Frank!"
0 Comentarios, 104 Vistas,
3 Votos
,3.43 Puntuación
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Speeding ticket 28/7/2007
A cop pulls a guy over for speeding and walks up to the driver
and says, "let me see your license." The driver relies, "I'm sorry officer, I can't
do that." "why not?" "I lost my license a few years ago because of a DUI that
resulted in a death." "Let me see your registration". "I can't do that either." "Why not?" "This isn't my car, I stole it." "Then open the glove box and let me see who it ...
0 Comentarios, 174 Vistas,
3 Votos
,4.41 Puntuación
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2 Blonde Jokes 19/5/2007
JOKE 1
Two friends chatting in a cafe.
The brunette says to the blonde, "You are what you eat you know"
The blonde looks up angrily and says, "Are you calling me a cunt!?" JOKE 2
Why did the blonde have bruises round her belly button?
Cause blonde guys arent that smart either =)
0 Comentarios, 273 Vistas,
7 Votos
,4.31 Puntuación
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Preacher Man on his deathbed 7/5/2007
An old preacher man is dieing. he sends a message to his Lawyer and and agent of the Inland
Revenue to come to his house immediatly, for time was short.
As they entered the room, the preacher beckoned them both
to sit on each side of the bed. For a long while nobody said anything. They were both honoured that the man had asked them to be
by his side, but were puzzled because the preacher had ...
0 Comentarios, 821 Vistas,
50 Votos
,5.44 Puntuación
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Margaret and Charles 18/2/2007
An elderly couple, Charles and Margaret, are in California.
Charles always wanted some authentic cowboy boots, seeing
some on sale one day, he buys them. Wears them back to the
house, walking proudly. He walks into the house and says
to his wife
(Charles) "Notice anything different?"
(Margaret) "Nope"
Frustrated Charles storms off into the bathroom, undresses,
and walks back ...
10 Comentarios, 3047 Vistas,
83 Votos
,4.18 Puntuación
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A Famous Mouse 18/2/2007
A well-known cartoon mouse go to head studios to meet with
the Manager, the Producer and a Consultant Psychologist.
The mouse walks into the room and takes a seat.
(Manager) "We have called you here to discuss the results of
your accusations towards your fellow Co-hostess"
(The Prouduce) "Micky, the Doctor here has done a full examination
of Minnie and found nothing to back up what ...
0 Comentarios, 173 Vistas,
16 Votos
,5.04 Puntuación
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He saved her life :-S 30/1/2007
There's these two country type blokes (Men) sitting
down to lunch at this fancy cafe, any way a lady near them
start's to choke on her food, all these people are running
around in a mad panic trying to work out what to do. So without
any fuss one of the country blokes walks over to this lady
, pulles down her pants and lickes the full crack of her arse!
she gets such a shock she spits out ...
1 Comentarios, 209 Vistas,
10 Votos
,2.79 Puntuación
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pants 30/11/2006
why are small pants like small hotels.
No ballroom.
0 Comentarios, 205 Vistas,
9 Votos
,1.29 Puntuación
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Asshole strecher 21/9/2006
A women was late for work and was driving somewhat over the
speed limit. Sure enough, just as she crossed a bridge she
saw a cop hiding there with his radar gun out. The cop pulled
her over and asked where she was going in such a hurry. She
said she was late for work. The cop said what do you do? She
said I am an asshole streacher. He asked How do you do that?
She said I start with ...
2 Comentarios, 456 Vistas,
22 Votos
,6.25 Puntuación
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Breast enlargement. 22/8/2006
A small breasted woman says to her husband "I've
seen an advert for breast enlargement, the surgery's
only charging $2000 dollars"
The husband says "Don't be rediculous, we can't
afford that. Why don't you just stuff some toilet tissue
down there"?
She says "That won't make much difference will
it"?
He says "Oh I dunno, it worked on your ass"!
3 Comentarios, 355 Vistas,
9 Votos
,1.93 Puntuación
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WHY IS A CUCUMBER BETTER THAN A MAN? 28/7/2006
This was sent to me by E-mail from a friend I have no idea who
wrote it or when... Enjoy
WHY IS A CUCUMBER BETTER THAN A MAN?
You can enjoy a cucumber all night long.
Cucumber stains wash out.
You don't have to drink wine and dine with a cucumber
before getting to the fun stuff.
Your cucumber will always wait patiently for you in the
car while you go shopping.
...
0 Comentarios, 293 Vistas,
20 Votos
,3.76 Puntuación
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if it hurt 2/4/2006
if it hurts its ok , it hurt me tooo , but then i knew the warm
rod would wide my wall an it would all feel so good an it did
, i felt it for days an wanted more
3 Comentarios, 445 Vistas,
20 Votos
,2.49 Puntuación
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why'd he post that? 9/3/2006
So he could get the free points I think
1 Comentarios, 248 Vistas,
9 Votos
,2.36 Puntuación
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Italian learning English 27/2/2006
A bus stops, and 2 Italian men get on. They sit down and engage
in an animated conversation. The lady sitting next to them
ignores them at first, but her attention is galvanized
when she hears one of them say the following:
<br>
<br>
<br>
"Emma come first. Den I come. Den two asses come together.
I come once-a-more. Two asses, they come together again.
I come again ...
6 Comentarios, 1991 Vistas,
101 Votos
,5.74 Puntuación
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WHAT'S IN A NAME? 17/2/2006
I WAS ON THE PHONE WITH A GUY NAMED PAUL, AND I COULDN'T
FIGURE WHICH GUY HE WAS, SO AFTER SEVERAL MINUTES OF CURIOSITY,
I FINALLY ASKED HIM TO TELL ME HIS HANDLE.
HE ANSWERED: "HANDLE'S MESSIAH".
1 Comentarios, 416 Vistas,
15 Votos
,0.68 Puntuación
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HARD WORK 16/2/2006
I HAD BEEN PROPOSITIONING JIMBO FOR YEARS, AND ALL HE EVER
DID WAS TEASE ME AND JOKE ABOUT IT. ONE DAY HIS ORIGINALITY
REALLY GOT RIGHT TO THE POINT. HE SAID, "I'LL
FUCK YOUR SUCKER, IF YOU'LL SUCK MY FUCKER."
0 Comentarios, 310 Vistas,
10 Votos
,1.59 Puntuación
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DELI HUMOR 16/2/2006
MY FRIEND JIM HAS ALWAYS BEEN QUICK WITH A BON MOT. ONE NIGHT
IN A DELI, ALSO A GAY BAR, THERE WERE SOME STRAIGHT GUYS WHO
WERE OBVIOUSLY TRYING TO ATTRACT OUR ATTENTION.
ONE OF THOSE GUYS SPREAD HIS LEGS WIDE AND GRABBED HIS CROTCH,
UPON WHICH JIM SAID, "NOW THAT'S AN ENGRAVED
INVITATION!"
0 Comentarios, 277 Vistas,
9 Votos
,2.57 Puntuación
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CLOWNING AROUND 16/2/2006
ONE NIGHT SEVERAL OF US GAY FRIENDS DECIDED VERY LATE TO
GO TO A STRAIGHT BAR ACROSS THE STREET FROM N.S.STATE UNIVERSITY.
WE WERE IN OUR PAJAMAS AND OVERCOATS, AND OUR "SLUTTY"
FRIEND LISA WAS WITH US. INSIDE THE BAR THERE WERE COMMENTS
AND CAT CALLS, AND WE WALKED OUT TO AVOID CONFRONTATION.
OUTSIDE WERE SEVERAL GUYS DRINKING BEER. ONE OF THEM SAID,
"WHAT IS THIS--THE CIRCUS?". LISA ...
0 Comentarios, 258 Vistas,
7 Votos
,4.31 Puntuación
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IS HE GAY? 16/2/2006
I HAVE MESSED WITH STRAIGHT GUYS FOR MOST OF MY LIFE, AND
MANY OF THEM HAVE BROUGHT FRIENDS FOR ME TO ENJOY. ONE NIGHT
TIM BROUGHT JERRY WITH HIM. AFTER WATCHING FOR AWHILE,
JERRY ASKED, "IS HE GAY?". TIM SAID, "NO,
HE'S NOT GAY. IT'S JUST THAT HE FOUND OUT HE LIKES
TO SUCK DICKS."
0 Comentarios, 361 Vistas,
15 Votos
,5.73 Puntuación
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GAY 16/2/2006
I HAD JUST GIVEN CHAZ HIS Nth BLOW JOB. AS I LOOKED UP FROM
HIS CROTCH, HE HAD A STRANGE LOOK ON HIS FACE. HE GRABBED
ME UNDER THE ARMS, PULLED ME UP TO HIS FACE, AND SAID ,
"DON'T EVER ACT GAY, AND DON'T EVER BE GAY."
SAY WHAT?
0 Comentarios, 291 Vistas,
9 Votos
,3.64 Puntuación
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Potato 12/2/2006
POTATO PROSTITUTES
<br>
Two little potatoes are standing on the street corner.
One is a PROSTITute.
<br>
How can you tell which one is the PROSTITute?
<br>
The one with the label:
<br>
I DA HO.
0 Comentarios, 284 Vistas,
12 Votos
,4.04 Puntuación
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Charlie Makes Me Laugh 10/2/2006
Howdy Cowboy’s:
<br>
<br>
I have been wondering lately why my life seams to of taken
on this unambiguous nature, and how things are working
out so much better these days, and after much deliberation
I have concluded that I owe all this to my boyfriend Charlie.
I met Charlie on Out Personals last year and we began chatting
and instant messaging, right at first we realized ...
0 Comentarios, 187 Vistas,
5 Votos
,4.12 Puntuación
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Maybe You'll Laugh, Maybe You Won't 31/1/2006
Howdy Cowboy’s:
<br>
From the suppressed memory bank’s of Uncle Buck, comes
another sensational contribution to the world of blog’s,
I was talking to my B/F Charlie and we were discussing some
of my adolescent experiences, when I started telling him
about something I used to do as a teenager, you may or may
not find humor in my non- fictional tale, but I had allot
of fun ...
0 Comentarios, 279 Vistas,
8 Votos
,4.64 Puntuación
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" DAD " Does Being Gay mean That You Are Going To Start Wearing Makeup And Pantyhose??? 11/1/2006
Howdy Cowboy's:
Recently Last year my family found out that I was Gay, it
was by accident, naming my ISP for accidentally sending
some illicit pictures that I was sending to someone was
coming back to my in box when my ISP decided to screw up and
they sent them to my ex wife, Oh well so she found out that
I was Gay, after 22 years of marriage and a divorce over things
not related to me ...
0 Comentarios, 386 Vistas,
6 Votos
,5.36 Puntuación
|
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This Midnight Cowboy's Gonna Ride !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 9/1/2006
Howdy Cowboy's; Let's get all the pleasantries
outta the way, Happy New Year to all you Cowboy's out
there.
<br>
NOW, as I was trying to think of something special to do for
new years this year, I had to look no further that my bed this
morning, as my newly attained partner of two weeks, my mind
started to reel about the cumming new year and what to do,
of course the couple hours ...
0 Comentarios, 350 Vistas,
2 Votos
,2.42 Puntuación
|
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embarassing time with a guy 31/12/2005
ok me and this guy had chatted for about a month straight.
We finally decided to meet. So he give me his address. We
decide what we are going to do and when.
So i go to his apartment complex only i have written the wrong
apartment number. There is a guy i had sex with 2 time before.
Hes in shock because we met at my place and not his. I'm
in shock thinking the guy i was meeting was this ...
1 Comentarios, 1027 Vistas,
29 Votos
,3.14 Puntuación
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A Gay Holiday Joke 15/12/2005
I'm assuming this is where to put this! Sense of humor
required.
<br>
Did you know that Frosty the Snowman is gay?! Yes, he's
such a flake! (ROF
0 Comentarios, 565 Vistas,
15 Votos
,1.29 Puntuación
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Erogenous Zones 30/11/2005
The biology teacher was explaining how various parts of
the body can offer pleasant feelings. Finally he said,
"It's sometimes more pleasurable to have a satisfying
bowel movement than to engage in sexual intercourse."
<br>
In the back of the room one streetwise student whispered
to the other, "Either I don't know how to shit
or he doesn't know how to fuck!!!"
0 Comentarios, 522 Vistas,
9 Votos
,6.42 Puntuación
|
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Does nobody have any humor. 10/8/2005
What is it with realtionship humor and people breaking
up because of one person saying something wrong. This has
happened a few times with freinds of mine that just dont
seem to understand the point of humor, life is to fun dont
take it for granted be happy you are in love.
0 Comentarios, 363 Vistas,
10 Votos
,3.78 Puntuación
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I guess this goes here... 28/5/2005
So, I think this was funny, well, it was funny for a minute
or two...
<br>
I was in bed with my boyfriend, let's call him Larry,
and he was, well, let's say "well hung"
and we had been making out for fifteen or twenty minutes
and stripping down to our underwear. He always wore a fresh
pair of tighty-whities, nothing fancy, plain old Fruit
of the loom, maybe a size too small for ...
0 Comentarios, 600 Vistas,
21 Votos
,5.48 Puntuación
|
|
Here is a good joke! 19/3/2005
Question:
What is the difference between a whore, a nymphomaniac
and your wife, while having sex?
<br>
Answer:
<br>
A whore says:
Aren't you done yet?
<br>
A Nympho says:
Your done allready?
<br>
Your wife says:
Blue, I think i'll paint the ceiling,
Blue!
2 Comentarios, 504 Vistas,
29 Votos
,4.54 Puntuación
|
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My Friend is an Exhibitionist ! 10/2/2005
I have a friend who has a secret fantasy which involves being
naked in public.
He would love to be kidnapped, stripped naked , or at least
have his pants and underwear pulled down to his ankles , tied
and bound , blindfolded , and gaged, and left in a public
place like a park or a mall parking lot.
<br>
He also wants to have this act of lewdness photograped with
a video camera ...
0 Comentarios, 403 Vistas,
11 Votos
,2.61 Puntuación
|
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Being a Metrosexual could be a Curse! 10/12/2004
Metrosexual (met.roh.SEK.shoo.ul) n. An urban male with
a strong aesthetic sense who spends a great deal of time
and money on his appearance and lifestyle.
metrosexuality n.
<br>
I suppose I am an urban male with a somewhat strong sense
of aesthetic... I don't like to spend a lot of money
and time on my appearance, but lets face it-- It takes some
$$$ to look good, and it ...
3 Comentarios, 535 Vistas,
41 Votos
,5.12 Puntuación
|
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Love in the Workplace 7/12/2004
I am assuming everyone that reads this article has had a
crazy crush with someone they have worked with. The type
of crush that when he stands next to you, it feels like heaven.
The type of crush that whatever he talks about (even about
dog poop) is interesting. What to do? We all know that when
we have a crush on someone, our imagination runs wild, and
things come up (literally).
...
2 Comentarios, 387 Vistas,
26 Votos
,4.97 Puntuación
|
|
be honest to you honey. 6/12/2004
I and my friend meet on outpersonals some few months ago
and we are planing to get marriage.and all of use are planing
a holly union wedding in washington D C SO PLESAE be honest
it pays.
REGARDS.
FREEBOY1
0 Comentarios, 230 Vistas,
11 Votos
,3.17 Puntuación
|
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sex after circumcision 19/11/2004
Many years ago at age 22 I had a circumcision as an adult which
was very painful and I don't recommend it for others.
Anyway, sex was supposed to be out of the question for 10-12
weeks. After about 8 difficult weeks, my lover and I decided
it was time to try. In the dark, he reached for the KY jelly
in the night stand and grabbed the Ben Gay instead. After
just a few very bried moments ...
2 Comentarios, 911 Vistas,
64 Votos
,5.64 Puntuación
|
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My 1st Lap Dance - Even a Gay Man Can Appreciate This 1/2/2004
It wasn't in late December, and it took place in 1995,
but I can still say "oh what a night". It actually
took place in Columbus, Georgia, at a place called the "Traffic
Light Lounge". I won't tell you why I was there,
but if anyone knows a little geography they'll figure
it out. One night some friends and I decided to go out and
have a "5-star" evening...food, beer, tattoos,
and of ...
0 Comentarios, 358 Vistas,
145 Votos
,4.50 Puntuación
|
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Guy walks into a bar... 25/1/2004
A guy came into a bar one day and said to the barman "Give
me six double vodkas." The barman says "Wow!
you must have had one hell of a day."
"Yes, I've just found out my older brother is
gay." The next day the same guy came into the bar and
asked for the same drinks. When the bartender asked what
the problem was today the answer came back, "I've
just found out that my younger brother is ...
0 Comentarios, 385 Vistas,
186 Votos
,8.38 Puntuación
|
|
Don't Ever Lie to Your Mother! 25/1/2004
A young man called John invited his mother over for dinner.
During the course of the meal, his mother couldn't
help but notice how handsome John's room-mate was.
She had long been suspicious of a relationship between
the two & this only made her more curious. Over the course
of the evening, while watching the two interact, she started
to wonder if there was more between John & his ...
0 Comentarios, 413 Vistas,
371 Votos
,9.42 Puntuación
|
|
whales 6/1/2004
An old whale and a young whale were swimming off the coast,
when they noticed a whaling ship.
The older whale recognised it as the same ship that had harpooned
his father many years earlier.
He said to the young whale: "Let's both swim under
the ship and blow out our air hole at the same time and it should
cause the ship to turn over and sink."
They tried it and sure enough, the ship ...
0 Comentarios, 516 Vistas,
187 Votos
,8.41 Puntuación
|
